Occasionally I will wake with a song on my heart. I love mornings like today. I woke from a deep sleep, all wrapped tight in warm covers. The light of dawn was faintly coming through the window. Lying there I longed to go back to sleep but instead a song began in my heart. Turn your eyes upon Jesus. Look full in His wonderful face. And the things of the earth will grow strangely dim. In ight of His glory and grace. (By Sovereign Grace 2019) This was such a precious way to start my day.
Yesterday I struggled with disappointment in people. I’m not usually one to “vent” because it just weighs on another and accomplishes nothing really. We had stayed home from church since the weather was rainy with gusty winds. I watched both early and late service with no closed caption. The second service I followed fairly well. Thank you Jesus.
It is interesting how when you aren’t busy, your mind can become a battle ground. The guys had gone to the gym. Staying home, my mind turned to people issues. Of all things Why in the world would my mind go there? We can’t do anything about the way people are and how others can drain life out of us. So yesterday I did want to “vent” but I prayed instead. I asked God to check MY heart. I asked Him to help me to respond in a way to bring glory to Him. Did my feelings go away? Nope! However, I started straightening up the closet and rediscovered a perfume box full of old pictures and cards. I sat at the table and began looking through them. Ron and Joshua came home and they too began to look through them. I found pictures from a Croatia mission trip when I was 3 months pregnant with Joshua. There were pictures of our first house and from a trip to the Bahamas with friends. Joshua saw these pictures from early in our marriage and he said, “What happened?” 😂I said , “31 years of marriage!” All in all it was a nice distraction from my previous line of thinking.
I did finally reach out to a friend late last night. I had told Ron I was feeling a bit depressed, but I’m the type to just “suck it up, buttercup”. I just deal with it and let it go. Or try to. It was nice sharing with my friend late last night She too understands disappointments with people. I told her I’ve learned to try to be content with whatever. (I can’t drive. I can’t do the things I want to do. I can’t make people care.) I’ve just learned to be content. My friend said, “A female version of Paul: Paulette”. That was seriously one of the nicest compliments. After sharing my heart, she had given me a different perspective and I felt better. So this morning, waking up to “Turn your eyes upon Jesus” was so fitting. It’s a new day and the sun is shining. It doesn’t matter what today holds, Jesus goes before me, follows me and lays His head of blessing on my head. I will turn my eyes upon Him and sure enough the cares of this world grow strangely dim, in light of His glory and grace.
Have a blessed day!
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