Monday morning after a weekend of rest, I don’t typically wake up and think about rest. Truth be told, I really don’t rest as much as I should. I can be still but my mind is always going places. Being a thinker and trying to figure things out causes me to usually be in some “state of thinking”.
Last night I was trying a new recipe for Chicken Philly hoagie sandwiches. (They turned out great. Just need a bit more seasoning next time.) Right before that I was working on Bible study notes which I need to figure out how to shorten. After cleaning up the kitchen I was editing notes to send to my Bible study group. Then I got online to research two entirely different things. One of those things being related to how to do a raised garden box. I’m trying to figure out what to put in the cedar planter that ended up being smaller than I thought. So many things to consider and figure out. You see it? A constant turning of my thoughts in one way or another.
Last night I forgot to take my Fitbit off so I woke to a series of vibrations when a friend texted me before the birds woke up. Once I was awake, I was right back at the “thinking game”. I sat down to pray and have my quiet time. I came across an acronym that really got my attention. R.E.S.T. Release every single thing. Wow. That is exactly what I need to do. R.E.S.T. Release every single thing to God.
It’s Monday and I’m already striving and trying to figure things out. I often try my best to “help” God but God does not need my help. He wants my submission and surrender. I’m like, “Lord I can only do so much. I can do my part but I can’t make things happen. Please open doors concerning Your Will or close doors we have no business entering.” That’s kind of how my prayer went this morning. I need to do a lot more R.E.S.T(ing) Releasing every single thing to God, and leave it there.
Surely I’m not alone. Is there anyone else out there who needs to R.E.S.T.? Let’s do this. It will be a lot lighter load when we release it and let our Heavenly Father work things out according to His Will. Have an awesome week.
As I get older, thankfully I’ve gained some wisdom along the way. I finally stopped coloring my hair and my word… it is full of gray, much more than I realized. But I’d like to thank I’v earned each one of them.
God has taught me many things in life. I wish I had been quicker in learning some of them when I was younger. Mistakes are a great teacher. Live and learn and pass on the gleamed wisdom to the next generation.
One thing I have learned in life is to be the kind of person you’d like to be friends with. If you want to meet kind and compassionate people, be kind and compassionate. If you long to find a good listener who speaks life into your situations, be that kind of person to others.
I absolutely love to serve others. It is something I can do and it makes my heart happy. Today as I prepared the beans for the homeless ministry that we have gotten involved with, it made me happy to contribute in some way. As we served in Rock Hill this evening, I saw one of our new homeless friends and I called out his name in greeting. Everyone is deserving of kindness. It doesn’t matter the situation just be kind.
Another thing I’ve learned in life is to reach out to others. Earlier today I was in our home office doing Bible study and making notes to share. I also texted several different people to encourage them or let them know I was thinking about them. I told Ron, “Just imagine if I could hear well enough to talk to people on the phone.” He laughed. Honestly it makes people feel good when they are thought of. The heart does a happy dance when you know people love and care. Reach out and encourage people. Imagine how much better the world would be if people did that more.
Another value lesson I’ve learned is to know my limits. Last week was honestly too busy. Being hearing and visually impaired is tiring on a day to day basis. I have to work to understand. It takes longer to do things but I love the challenge. It is just a fact of life. However I refuse to “sit on the sidelines”. I prefer to LIVE. So besides the usual day to day, I also did Food pantry volunteering, RiceNBeans cooking and outreach and prepped and taught a long Bible study. With the high pollen here in South Carolina my allergies had flared up and my eyes were so very DRY. This made seeing my notes that were “zoomed in large” hard to see. I had signed up to participate in a 5K at our church but it was forecast to rain. I was exhausted. I felt the rain was God giving me an “out” for the 5K. Im sad I missed it but I was beyond my limit and I needed rest. This week I’m back at it but asked the Bible study girls if we could divid the lessons in two parts. It’s more manageable for me and gives us more of a chance to discuss life application. It’s okay to ask for a favor. It’s more than okay to request prayer. It’s okay to say “I’m sorry I can’t but will join next time.”
It is also fine to not see “eye to eye”with everyone about everything. Healthy calm discussions are needed. We have a generation that is so confused by nonsense in our culture and easily offended. It’s important to have the “hard talks” and pass along wise council. Just be sure to do it respectfully, trying to see the other persons point of view. There are so many angles to view a situation.
It’s also vital to demonstrate leadership skills and a faithful walk with Jesus. The other night I had a rare opportunity of a deep talk with our son. Those talks don’t happen often since he is grown and own his own. As I listened to his hopes and dreams and how he wanted to move forward, I had to seize that opportunity to stress the importance of bringing God into each of those decisions. Our kids no matter the age need to know how much they are loved. I said, “ God loves you so much. Way more than me and dad. Imagine that.” Each and every decision God wants to be a part of. You know you can talk to God about anything. Our Abba Father cares about every thing. I told Joshua, “ You can pray that God will open a door or opportunity or close it, after all He knows what’s behind each door.” Love, direct and pray over your kids no matter what their age. They are a treasure from the Lord.
There is so much more but I will end with this last thing. Trust God. God is working even when we don’t see it. Last week at Bible study the oldest in our group shared the idea of God weaving a beautiful masterpiece. Each one of us is a “thread”. We all come together as God chooses, as a little part of the bigger masterpiece. Isn’t that beautiful? She’s raised three kids and has a bunch of grandkids. She shares the wisdom she’s gleamed in many trails. I know I can always ask her for prayer. Recently when a situation was discouraging, I texted her and asked her to pray. She reminded me that “God was busy weaving”, He is always working on us. Trusting is hard especially when you don’t yet “see” the answers to your prayers. Just know God is working out His best and while we don’t see the BIG PICTURE, He does. He will bring it all together. Just trust Him.
If you liked this blog post please subscribe and share. I’m thankful for this gift to share when God puts something on my heart. You can find my autobiography Rooted by the Water on Amazon. (Hard cover soft cover, and e-book formats.) I pray it gives you great hope and courage to surrender to Jesus. He is all you really need. All for the Glory of God.
Time sure does fly. You blink and a three years has gone by. Tomorrow, March 12 is not only my husband Ron’s birthday but also my dad’s third heavenly birthday. Three years ago tomorrow we took him to the hospital, fully expecting to bring him home. After all, his momma lived to be 101, bouncing back after many trials. It’s true that God’s ways are not our ways. When God calls us home, we will go.
We have handled his loss well because we know we will see him again. It was a “see you later” knowing he is with Jesus now. No more cancer, no more pain. But I sure do miss him.
Today when I was outside changing the garden flags, I walked to the back fence and smile. There in full bloom was the tulip tree we planted almost three years ago in honor of dad. He and mom have a beautiful one and I love their tulip tree. When dad died, I asked Ron if we could plant one. It blooms around the time of his heavenly birthday each year. Our upstate South Carolina soil is red clay. It’s not the best for growing things but we were extra careful mixing in some peat moss and good soil in the large hole we dug. I wanted to make sure it had the best chance of survival. So far so good. Each year it’s grown a bi more and has more blooms. Seeing those blooms today put a smile in my heart.
Grief is the oddest thing. Memories come all the time of treasured moments over the years. I was a “Daddy’s Girl”. I could talk to him about anything and he would listen and give sound advice. He enjoyed a good game of Skipbo with the family. We used to have four generations around the table playing that card game. He and his momma were sharp players and they both played to win. I recently found Skipbo online and downloaded it on my iPad. It’s a fun card game but nothing compares to the memories when we all played it together.
Dad and his Momma playing Skipbo
Tomorrow is also food pantry day. Mom and dad both volunteered at the Fort Mill Church of God food pantry for years. Eight years ago I started volunteering with them there. Dad would swing by and pick me up to take me with him and meet Mom there. He would always stop by and get me and mom a cup of tea: sweet for mom and half and half for me. I miss him when we are volunteering. Seems like he should be in the next room praying for the clients as them come in. Mom still does that and I help pack the food boxes.
Most of all I miss the talks. He was a very generous man who loved his family well. His generous spirit and legacy lives on in us all. In honor of my Dad, this blog is for you. Oh and one more thing Dad… Forrest is doing so well and your great grands are showing the Kenley genes. My goodness. When I see pictures of them I see your boy. I know you would love that. Mom sure does. Shes doing very well too, a strong woman. Love and miss you always.
Me and dad on the way to volunteer at the food pantry
Sitting here at nearly 9 pm EST, on a Monday night in February, sweating. Here in upstate South Carolina, it has rained all day with temperatures pretty steady in the 50s with 95% humidity.
It has been a “Push through it” kind of day from beginning until now. Rainy Mondays can be that way. I went to sleep last night wearing my Fitbit. It vibrates when a text comes in, so AT&T was my alarm clock, with an automatic text telling me my payment was made. (Like I don’t know that?) I was in a deep sleep, dreaming I was on a pier with a dove on my arm. Very interesting. Would have liked to know the end of it.
While I can feel the Fitbit vibrate, I can’t see anything on the little screen when it lights up. Thankfully it is synced with my iPad so I could check the text. Seeing it was nothing worth even checking, I got up to make some coffee. Thirty minutes later my friend Leasa texted to see if I’d go to Home Depot with her to help her find something to finish a project. I was still half a sleep and my question was, “How soon?” I ended up quickly washing my face and throwing on some clothes. She picked me up about 20 minutes later and we were off. After talking to several men there about the project she was doing, we finally found what she needed. During the process, she told me all about a movie she and her husband saw yesterday. We grabbed some Chick-fil-A then she brought me home.
My husband and I had planned to go to the gym to workout, but I still felt tired. I told him to give me about an hour and maybe I’d be ready to go. In the meantime, he helped me register for a 5k that our church is having. I’m not a runner, but plan to walk it with some friends. I finally said, “Okay let’s go”. Ron asked, “Are you sure you feel like it?” I replied, “No but let’s get it done.” Nothing like signing up for an event to get moving.
We got to the gym and started on the treadmills. Usually we just warm up for about 20 minutes then continue with strength training. Today I went two miles at a good pace then went looking for Ron in the weight area. He was wearing a red shirt so I figured he would be easy to find, with my low vision. But several guys were wearing red today. I finally found him and told him where I would be. Usually we stick together but today we did different things. The thing is, with my low vision I don’t always see people on the machines until I’m just a few feet away. Oh boy and being tired from that two mile walk didn’t help matters. Ron is a sweetheart. He came up to help me on the machines and I told him I hadn’t really seen the guy on the machine I wanted to use, but I “played it off”. I don’t think the guy noticed I didn’t see him. Welcome to my crazy life. We both got a good workout in and I was one sweaty mess. Nothing like pushing through a day when you just aren’t feeling it and it’s rainy and muggy outside.
This 5K event is something to keep me accountable with walking and strength training. Doing different types of things can be a bit unnerving at times though. The last time I did a 5K was about 9 years ago. That one I ran but I didn’t know the course. The directions were marked out on signs that I could not see. Oh my word, but I finally did cross the finish line. This time I’m going to do it with friends and they will help me know where to go.
There is nothing like good friends that get you moving. Whether it’s a quick run in the morning to Home Depot, doing Bible study, doing mission work or preparing for a 5K to do together. It’s worth pushing through to do whats is needed.
It’s almost time to “call it a day and hit the hay”. I’m glad I pushed through this day. It’s been a full one and it’s fulfilling to reach bedtime and say It’s been a good day even with the AT&T wake up text and muggy rainy weather. Tomorrow will be another busy day but it will be another fulfilling one volunteering at the food pantry then spending some time with my Mom.
I hope you all have an awesome week. Just “push through it” even when you don’t feel like it. You will be glad you did. Good night everybody.
I’m debating whether to even put this in writing. I occasionally give a true, honest, transparent look at life as a visually and hearing impaired person. Today was one of those days when inwardly I’m like.. Oh great! 🤦🏽♀️ Yet outwardly I am hopefully all smiles! Did I pull it off? I think I did but who knows.
Before I even went out the door I was praying and thanking God that His joy is my strength. As I prayed I said Lord, you fill my heart with joyand peace despite the circumstances. Help me! How the day would unfold if I did not start off in Gods word, prayer snd praise , I don’t want to ever find out. It’s tough. Mental and spiritual preparation is so helpful especially when I know I’m going to be feeling like a “fish on dry ground”
Put me in a group of any size and it’s challenging. Mom picked me up to take me to my nieces baby shower. I’m 54 and my 80 year old Mom is driving me around. It’s a fact of life I don’t think I will ever be used to. We arrived at the beautiful shower honoring my niece and many showed up to bless her. At most showers of any type there are fun activities. One was to write a note for the baby that he would see on his 18th birthday. Trouble was the pieces of paper wete small with tiny lines to write on. I can’t see well enough to read my handwriting any more, not to mention writing on lines. Oh Lord help me! What to do? I closed my worse eye and tried to legibly write on the lines. I asked Mom if she could read it, thankfully she could. One down a couple more to go. Next was four jars to guess how many items were in each. I told Mom to just write some numbers. We went out on the deck and there was another activity I did not even see until I was close up. Everyone worked on making baby’s first ABC book. I used to love to color really detailed sketches but I can’t see well enough to do that anymore. Oh the joys of having low vision… NOT! (But I did one anyway. Although I did not sign my name on it. If my niece reads my blog… the one that looks like a kid did it was done by yours truly…. Aunt Shannon 😂 ) That’s just the activities, now let’s talk about the food. I could not find the forks on the table. They were right in front of me but transparent, so I did not see them. Okay…. next! I could see the deviled eggs, crackers, chips and fruit. The kabobs were another story. It took me a second to figure out how to pick it up. Lord have mercy! If people only knew the challenges it would blow your mind. This is just the visual part, not to mention the hearing part. My hearing loss is noticeable but my visual issue is not. What am I to do? Stay home? No! I live life and just hope to play it off! It’s not about me. It’s about blessing those around me. Is it uncomfortable? You bet! Is it cringe worthy? Absolutely! Did anyone notice? Hopefully not except Mpm of course. Even she doesn’t realize how bad my vision is.
Some things in life I don’t think I will ever understand on this side of eternity. It takes a lot of grit on the inside and smiles on the outside. It takes a lot of prayers and small pep talks to get through it. Only God understands. It’s hard. I can’t give in. I must get out and live life even though the normal things are so frustrating. I want to particulate and bless those around me.
If you saw me typing up this blog you would get a good laugh. Part of it I type and part of it I speak. Typos are everywhere because touch screens are so tricky. I use my iPad for blogging. However artificial intelligence can’t understand me half the time and I speak clearly! I say one thing and it types another. I say “ You can’t hear! And it says, “ I’m sorry you feel that way!” I’m over it!
Whether I will publish this or delete it is going through my head. On one hand, it’s helpful to see the difficulties people have to face, difficulties that are for the most part invisible. On the other hand, the truth can be terribly embarrassing. Peoples lives are so different. This is a reminder to be kind, considerate, and helpful. Today is almost over and tomorrow I will step into whatever God has for me. I won’t do it alone. He is with me every step of the way. Treat people the way you want them to treat you. Until next time…
If you liked this blog post please subscribe and share. I write when God puts something on my heart. You can find my autobiography Rooted bythe Water on Amazon. I pray it gives you great hope and courage to surrender to Jesus. He is all you really need. All for the Glory of God. Be blessed!
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